Margie’s own spirit that accentuates the positive

The past month has been field with variety of new encounters. Margie has had cataract surgery now in both eyes and is an the last weeks of the drops. The surgery was an immediate success and her vision in both eyes is clear and bright. She will be getting a refraction for new glasses within two weeks. This will give her great reading ability to add to her good long distance vision now.

On the cancer front, there have been downs and ups. Her valiant resilience to the difficult chemotherapy of the beginning of the year coupled with the challenge of radiation that lasted through June did not succeed in mitigating the advance of her triple negative fast growing cancer. Ceci had found a nodule in the midst of the radiation and the redoubling of the radiation effort only burned Margie’s skin. The nodules were reappearing by the end of August.

As she prepared to meet her wonderful surgeon the last week of August to attend to the nodules, an unusual rash appeared on her right side. This the surgeon intuited was the cancer reappearing in the skin. A biopsy confirmed this. In the meantime, Steve found a laboratory in Long Beach run by Dr. Nagourney that would perform tests on cancers to determine reactions to standard chemotherapies. In addition, Margie went in for a CT scan to determine if there was more than just the skin involved in the spread.

Margie’s attitude was straightforward and her daily life was unchanged. In fact she indicated that she felt fine. She continued with her personal trainer, Sabrina, twice a week as well as her active social life. And of course her positive view and her laugh prevail.

The first week of September, in combination with her first cataract surgery, Margie had a nodule removed and packed in dry ice for shipping to Dr. Nagourney Lab. The results came in the following week and showed several options. Margie’s oncologist, Dr. Greenwald, studied the results and had several options that he presented on 14 September, just before her second cataract surgery!

At this meeting we learned the first piece of good news: the CT scan showed that all her solid organs were looking good and were healthy and well. Margie’s resilience was showing here. Her daily life reflects this good news. She awakes daily felling pretty good overall, her strength is good… she can walk around the whole of her complex within 10 minutes and estimates that twice around is about one mile. With Sabirina, she scales all the stairs in her apartment complex helping the strength of her legs.

The cancer skin rash is there, but the CT scan showed no the major organs were affected. Dr. Greenwald said, at this first meeting, that we can see the source of the problem now in the skin and the strategies we could embark on will be visible. His solution would be a new round of chemotherapy, just exactly what, was yet to be fully determined. There were options based on the lab results, but the exact path was not clear. He order that we do no more surgical removal of nodule and to simply watch the skin. In the meantime, Dr. Greenwald felt he had to study the data more, and to talk with Dr. Nagourney’s lab in Long beach to clear up subtleties of the results. We scheduled a meeting for the following Monday.

Ceci arrived for a short 5 day visit over the weekend and was able to be with Margie for her next meeting with Dr. Greenwald on the 21st. Here he presented his solution. He had weighed in several options, but after clarifying details with Dr. Nagourney, Dr. Greenwald felt that he had only one really viable solution. He was anxious to move ahead immediately because, just in the intervening week, he saw the advance of the cancer bloom on Margie’s skin. He felt there was no time to waste. She would go in on Wednesday.

We were told to monitor the rash and see if there was a reaction to the new round of chemotherapy. This was a challenge, as we had reason to think there would be something positive, but did not want to bring out false hopes. To track the rash, Ceci and Anabel reviewed the situation on the 22, the day before the chemotherapy, looking at the extent, the limits, and the nodules (described by Margie not like a pea but like the head of a corsage pin!). Being dispassionate in the observations is important so that the realistic measures are monitored. It was hard. We decided on photography as a way to gauge the changes, and this was later affirmed as a great strategy by the surgeon, Dr. Grafton.

We are two and a half weeks out from the new chemotherapy. There is great news to report:
1. Margie is “tolerating” the chemotherapy very well. Daily rhythm is steady!
2. Margie’s blood work is great, no anemia, no fatigue!
3. Most significant, Margie’s cancer rash is not growing!

Combining these three factors adds up to a strategy to manage Margie’s cancer and maintain her good quality of life. She is hail and strong. Her daily activities continue unchanged, her quality of life is ever improving! One week after the chemo administration, Margie was entertaining 10 wonderful girlfriends she has traditionally lunched with. She arranged the whole event at the Vista del Monte dinning area. They made a exclusive table, decorated it specially for her, and put on nice table settings with wine glasses for her group. Not only was she looking forward to this wonderful event, but she was energized by it. She brought her group up to her apartment and Andreya, one of Margie’s helpers, had her famous Polaroid handy to document the cheer. The best part, Margie exclaimed, was there was no clean up! This past week, the thank you cards poured in acclaiming the luncheon a great success.

While all this medical intrusion weaves through Margie’s life, she has met another milestone, and this with the steadfast support of Steve. Margie’s manuscript, A Quintet in Asia Minor, is complete. Margie is going over a final reading of the nearly 300 pages of text chronically the 10 years between 1956 and 1966 where she reminiscences about our family travels in Europe and the Middle East. It is a tour de force, well written, engagingly paced, and full of her own reflections. Steve has taken his absorbing interest in our family photographs to compile them for the manuscript. He has also worked with Margie’s good friend and artist John Rindlaub to bring to life the numerous maps that help visualize the geography of her memoir. The whole compilation is to be assembled and published as a limited edition by Steve. Expect to hear of the book signing soon!

In sum, we find ourselves cheering the day on a positive note. Our recent meetings with Dr. Greenwald and Dr. Grafton conferring on the state of the cancer rash have been constructive and optimistic. Dr. Greenwald was very encouraged, agreeing with Anabel’s assessment that were not seeing any progression of the skin rash. Ceci reminds us that this is a cancer that grows at an astonishing rate. To see no change is remarkable and noteworthy, and so deemed Dr. Greenwald. We were all very relieved for this news as well as by the good lab results. All of this tallies well with Margie’s own spirit that accentuates the positive, eliminates the negative, latches onto the affirmative and never messes with Mr. in-between.

Ac-cent-chu-ate the Positive

Marjorie had a role in the 1944 movie: Here Come the Waves

Here are the specs and below please find a rendition of the wonderful song many know from that movie. A good theme for our Margie!

Director: Mark Sandrich Writers: Ken Englund and Zion Myers (writer)
Genre: Comedy | Musical Nominated for Oscar
Release Date: 18 December 1944 (USA) more
Tagline: They're in the NAVY now!
The hit song of the movie Ac-cent-chu-ate the Positive, by Johnny Mercer, was one of Bing's biggest.
Complete credited cast
Bing Crosby ... Johnny Cabot
Betty Hutton ... Susan / Rosemary Allison
Sonny Tufts ... Windy 'Pinetop' Windhurst
Ann Doran ... Ruth
Gwen Crawford... Tex
Noel Neill ... Dorothy
Catherine Craig... Lt. Townsend
==> Anabel Shaw ... Isabel (listed at that time as Marjorie Henshaw)
Paramount Pictures, Inc. Production Dates 11 May--5 Aug 1944
Premiere Information New York opening: 27 Dec 1944
Release Date Jan 1945




Bing Crosby and Bette Midler
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z45EB4TiYz4
Aretha Franklin
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4IP9h40z0sk&feature=fvw
Andrew Sisters
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Oq29Hs-6uP4&feature=related
Ukulele
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KgMqCBzhxdw

News update

Courageous Marge forges on.... Strong of sprit and ready for the next challenge! Details forthcoming

Margie off exercising in the Vista pool!!!

Ceci is visiting Margie this week. As I (ceci) write, Margie is off at the pool for exercise. Now that's a great sign, no? She does exercises with her Pilates instructor, Sabrina, a couple of times a week and always enjoys errands, cleaning up, and just visiting with her home companions Kara and Andreya (5 afternoons a week).

Ceci stays till the 6th of August, when Linda and the kids arrive from San Diego. Linda, Steve, Ellie and Tyler will all enjoy time with Margie (and Margie with them!), plus more fun at Fiesta.

Anabel has been home from Mexico for the past week. She as Estela (who worked for our father in the San Fernando Valley for several years and has been an enormous help for Margie on weekends during cancer treatments) -- anyway, they have been feverishly clearing out every last thing from Margie's condo so that the realtor can make it shine for showing.

Love to everyone,
cc

another song for Mom

Remember that this blog sometimes works for Ceci to share with her mom, Margie. Also remember that the other videos that YouTube offers after you watch this one are not my choices. Who knows how YouTube comes up with these associations?

So here's a song for Mom/Margie today:

(click here)

Book excerpt- featuring Margie!

Just a snippit from Bob Fulmer's fantastic writing. Bob is one of Margie's dear friends and fellow Santa Barbara walker. You will see that he features our beloved Marjorie (AKA Anabel Shaw) in this part of a book project:

Walking with Tom is more intellectually stimulating than physically challenging. He doesn't walk quite as fast as he used to, but his mind hasn't slowed down at all. He reads Scientific American from cover to cover and points out the articles he thinks that I might understand. We swap books, usually agree on politics, and discuss his philanthropic interests in encouraging early reading opportunities for disadvantaged children in the United States and around the world.

The “Beach Walkers” group has become a community unto itself. Muriel collected e-mail address for about 40 some-time participants and circulates information about events like a pot luck holiday party at Linda and Pete’s townhouse or breakfast at Dotti’s clubhouse. At least once a month, Albie will bake cupcakes or brownies to celebrate recent birthdays after breakfast or someone will send out an invitation to stop by for ‘tea and crumpets’ or ‘beer and pretzels.’

Not long ago, Antonia invited everyone for “an evening of entertainment.” She and Raul live on a spacious lot with ten chickens and a variety of exotic fruit trees. They had cooked a ham and turkey for the main course. The rest of us were encouraged to “bring your spouse (if you have one) and one other covered dish.” Tonia had been mysterious about the plan for the evening, but after filling our plates and glasses, we sat down to watch a black and white movie from 1947. There were a few raised eyebrows at this choice for the entertainment until we recognized that Anabel Shaw, the stage name for the star of Killer at Large, was Marjorie Henshaw, one our walkers who had been on the cover of Life Magazine in 1940. Marjorie had turned down a couple of movie contracts until she could graduate from college, and discovered that, at 22, she didn’t have the same choices as had been available just three years earlier.

By Marjorie’s admission, her starring role was in a “B Movie” that took a whole week to film and for which she was paid the grand sum of $1000. Although more than 60 years had passed, Marjorie still had the “good bones” and vivacious personality that had attracted Hollywood talent scouts. In my opinion, the film slowed down when she wasn’t on screen, so I looked around the room and realized that most of these ordinary people had enjoyed extraordinary lives because they took responsibility for how those lives evolved.

Seated next to Marjorie was Mylene, the youngest member of the group, who in her 40s, became a retired Philadelphia litigator, and now studies and gives lessons on the harp and organ. Mylene lives simply, rents a small guest cottage in the upper Eastside and maintains only one vestige of her former demanding profession, a 2000 Porsche Boxster which she alternates with a ten-speed bike for local transportation.

Mike now spends much of his time volunteering for the Red Cross, and travels to problem spots around the country to help facilitate the organization’s fabled disaster response efforts. He attended 11 colleges before completing an undergraduate degree in business and an MBA that qualified him for a good career in the aerospace industry. Once, as I was about to leave for Peoria to facilitate a “Leadership Quest” program with high potential leaders at Caterpillar, Mike confided that he had worked for CAT when he was only 15 years old.

“I’m not saying that you didn’t work for CAT,” I challenged, “but I am pretty sure that they observed child labor laws even back in the dark ages when you were a teenager.”

“Oh, they wouldn’t have hired me if they had known my age,” he explained. “But my family needed a wage earner and I was the logical choice so I took a bus to Peoria. When the hiring agent questioned that I was 18 and told me to come back with proof, my uncle helped me modify my birth certificate, so I was suddenly three years older. I’m still grateful to Caterpillar because they paid me well, taught me good work habits and inspired me complete college no matter how long it took.”

“Did they encourage you to take classes at Bradley College?” I asked.

“Actually, I wasn’t even in high school yet, but during the orientation session, they introduced us to man who had been at the same inspection station for 35 years. The thought of standing in the same place and doing the same thing for more than twice the time I had been alive made me a believer in higher education.”

Mike went on to complete high school, and found a job was in the mail room of the CIA in Washington. After proving himself trustworthy, he was promoted to become a secure mail courier, and soon he picked up assignments throughout the Far East as a security assistant. I would have asked for more details about his adventures, but am still afraid he would have to kill me if I knew the whole the story.

Nan is the only person I know who is able to hear because of an cochlear transplant. She works for the deaf at the California Department to Rehabilitation, and coincidentally, before we joined the walkers, had purchased our East Beach townhouse.

Before I finished circling the room with my rumination, the movie ended, so we talked about Marjorie’s performance and what being a ‘star’ was like in the 1940s. When the conversation lagged a bit, I shifted the topic, “Tonia, that’s a very unusual statuette you have on the mantle. Can you tell us where you found it?”

“Oh, that,” she replied, “It’s one of my grandfather’s Oscars.”

“Don’t tell us, “I said, trying to gauge the correct timeframe, “Let me guess, your grandfather was Alfred Hitchcock.”

“No, but gramps did work with him on a couple of pictures.”

We finally learned that Tonia was the granddaughter of Frank Lloyd who was one of the founders of the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences and the first Scottish Academy Award winner. Lloyd received three Oscar nominations in 1929 for his work on a silent film, a part-talkie and one of the early all talkies. During his distinguished career, he worked with most of Hollywood’s legends and is probably best remembered for Mutiny on the Bounty, which he produced, scripted and directed.

As we prepared to leave, I looked around and realized that our little group included three Canadians, two folks from the British Isles, one person from Peru, one from Tennessee, and even one from Alabama. There were two former civil rights workers, one peace corps volunteer, and at least three republicans. I suspect that each of us is a little surprised when we look in the mirror and wonder who that aged stranger can be. Sally kiddingly comments, “When I was young, I was always interested in the latest, hip joints, and today, I still am. It’s just that the definition of ‘hip’ has changed for me.” Yes, hip replacements may account for the speed and mobility of some of the group. Tom may skew the average a bit, but the median age is probably getting close to 70.

Everyone is ordinary, and everyone is special, with a unique story of how they came to be who and where they are.

The walking group doesn’t impose many rules, but Tom and I have one inviolate requirement for our stroll. Each day, usually after we’ve reached the half-way point and turned around and started back toward the Grill, we look ahead and see friends who have a slightly faster pace as we all head toward a reward of coffee and conversation. To the left, we look over the red tile roofs of downtown and the Rivera to the purplish peaks of the Santa Ynez Mountains. To the right is the curving coast line of the Pacific dotted with palm trees. The weather is almost always perfect. We alternate the responsibility of picking the point to turn to the other and say sincerely, “Aren’t we lucky to live here.”

Last day of Ceci's visit (july 2nd, '09)

First: I just noticed that I didn't list Margie's fantastic surprise last Friday when we arrived at her East Beach Walkers' group. Not only did they greet her with applause, but they then produced a delicious cake with "You Go Girl!" on a flag flying from the top. What at joy. I do have some little video clips of this to put up on the blog when I get back to Madison.

Okay, so... the last day of my visit with Margie/Mom ( I will be back at the end of July, plus Anabel returns next week, and Steve, Linda and kids will visit again soon and particularly at the start of August).

Today, Thursday, Mom and I had both a busy and a relaxing day. I went cat-food shopping at Lazy Acres while mom got herself breakfast and visited the Vista Clinic. I then stopped by the condo to look for a few things that mom has been missing (including her beloved guest bathroom watercolor, plus vases, trays etc.). She was delighted to see these precious and familiar things.

After lunch, Mom's pilates teacher came by, and they worked hard. Then came Andreya, one of the lovely care givers Anabel arranged through Home Instead. Andreya and Mom did things around the apartment, while I rode my bike back to the beachside rental place, and Andreya & Mom drove down to pick me up.

Then we all relaxed, with Andreya guiding us in a yoga relaxation and breathing exercise (Andreya is also a very very skilled yoga teacher). I recorded the guided meditation and made it into a CD for mom to listen to at other times.

Finally, Mom and I shared a nice little meal, watched PBS, and are now preparing for bed!