Monday, February 22, 2010

Margie update Feb. 22, 2010

Dear friends and family of Marjorie Henshaw:

As you all know, Margie is in the midst of a drug trial. In a few weeks, the doctor will be able to measure whether the experimental treatment has affected the spread of her cancer. In the meantime, Margie finds her energy and her pain levels are not predictable. The treatments are taking a toll. Much as she would like to make social plans, she expressed (to me=Ceci) that it is hard to tell if she will have the spirit to really do what she says, "yes" to.

She told me that she does not want to plan very far ahead, and she does not want to commit to any car trips. Of course, driving around Santa Barbara is no problem, but she feels that longer day trips have taken too much out of her in the past weeks. She likes having friends and family join her for lunch or dinner either at Vista del Monte or going out, but being a hostess feels hard. Even with family, she prefers not to have more than a couple of us staying at one time.

Our loving Margie Henshaw has trouble saying, "No" to invitations or visits from friends and loved ones, so do be aware that she may be working to be her energetic and loving self (whom most of us know her as!). May I ask that, when you invite her out or suggest a visit, you please help her take a moment to think about what she wants to do. I find it effective to ask her to take a breath and check in with her body and her energy before she decides. I tell her it's okay, completely okay, if she would rather rest or not make a date. If we do this, we are more likely to get an honest answer, and one that is truly best for her.


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